Archive for the 'Cybermen' Category

Doomsday: Void Material

Published by Jon on 8 February 2010 in Cybermen, Daleks, Deus Ex Machina, Doomsday, Episodes, Russell T Davies and The Tenth Doctor.

This is the first in a number of posts about the disastrous climax of series two of the new Doctor Who, the episode in question – Doomsday – contains what is possibly the worst dialogue ever broadcast. Not only that but some of the ideas it contains, and the implementation of those ideas, are beyond ridicule.

Enough of all this spiel, let’s get on with the curious case of Void material…

In Doomsday we discover that anyone that’s been in the Void gets covered in Void Material. The longer you’re in, the more gets stuck to you. Simple. How do you detect if you have any of this Void material on you though?

Well the only way to detect Void material is by the use of a complex series of detectors that unravel all the tightly knotted dimensions of space that surround the target and count the number of positive hits from the particles of Void material as they struggle to return to their own dimension.

Either that or just put on a pair of cheap 3D glasses.

Void material detection for the unimaginative.

This is yet another example of Davies’ piss-poor writing for Doctor Who and his lack of imagination. He just goes for a very cheap and unsatisfying gimmick that runs the length of the show until the disappointing reveal at the end.

It’s as if we’re supposed to sit there watching The Doctor running about in 3D specs and think that it’s just The Doctor being all whacky and out-there.

The problem with that is that we always know that if The Doctor is doing something whacky and out-there, sooner or later it’s going to become a plot point. It never actually is The Doctor being a little eccentric, every time he does it, it’s being done with a higher – albeit entirely unfathomable – purpose.

Remember when he used to eat Jelly Babies? There was no particular reason for that other than plain old eccentricity. Continue reading ‘Doomsday: Void Material’

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You Can Write This Shit Russell, But You Can’t Say It

Published by Jon on 2 January 2010 in Cybermen, Daleks, Doomsday, Russell T Davies and The Tenth Doctor.

Over the past few hours we’ve been pondering about the reasons behind our lack of enthusiasm – to put it mildly – over Russell T Davies re-imagining of The Doctor and his adversaries.

The single biggest issue wasn’t with the design of the villains, which on the whole was decent. Nor was it with the sets, which although unimaginative were at least a lot more solid than the classic show’s.

No, it was neither of these things that ruined Russell T Davies vision of Who, it was the writing.

We’ve said it before and we’ll say it again, Russell T Davies can do drama but he can’t do sci-fi and he certainly can’t write believable dialogue. Do you want some proof? Ok, read this:

Dalek: You propose an alliance?

Cybermen: This is correct.

Dalek: Request denied.

Still with us? You’ve got to agree that’s an appalling interchange that is neither grammatically correct – a proposal is not a request – nor neccesary! If the Daleks are going to tear the Cybermen a new arsehole, you’d imagine they wouldn’t feel the need to announce it.

It gets worse though, feast your eyes on the response to the denied request, the Cybermen go on a deleting spree:

Cybermen: Hostile elements will be deleted.

Dalek: Exterminate!

Yawn. A couple of Cybermen get offed by a Dalek.

Cybermen: Open visual link. Daleks be warned you have declared war upon the Cybermen.

That’s a fair line. The Cybermen are rational, thinking creatures, offering the Daleks a way out of any conflict with a fairly assertive statement. However given their response, the Daleks seem to think they’re The Rock and they’re at WrestleMania XXVII.

Dalek: This is not war this is pest control.

Christ. Please stop. Alas, the smack talk continues.

Cybermen: We have five million Cybermen, how many are you?

Dalek: Four.

Cybermen: You would destroy the Cybermen with four Daleks?

Dalek: We would destroy the Cybermen with one Dalek.

Why don’t you then?

I’ve saved the best for last though. Without doubt what follows is the single worst piece of dialogue ever conceived. It totally pisses over everything that the Daleks are supposed to be and in the delivery of the sort of line you’d expect Arnie to be using in 1986, destroys any sense of menace that they ever had.

Ready?

Dalek: You are superior in only one respect.

Cybermen: What is that?

Dalek: You are better at dying! Raise communications barrier!

How pathetic is that? That’s not the sort of things the Daleks would do. Surely?

Can you imagine a war film with Hitler and Churchill where they use that dialogue? No. Neither can we. Pathetic.

As a special treat here’s a clip – from YouTube – of the entire exchange. Watch it if you feel brave enough.

You were warned…

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